In a recent Slate column, a mother grapples with the discovery of a dildo while cleaning her daughter's room. The daughter, now in college, is staying in the city for an internship. The mother wonders whether to return the item or leave it be. The column advises against sending it back, as doing so could humiliate her daughter. Instead, it suggests gently prompting her to see if she wants to retrieve items on her next visit, and encourages fostering a dialogue about sexual health and pleasure, should the mother feel comfortable.
If you and your daughter had the sort of relationship where you could laugh at something like this, I would tell you to send the dildo with a silly note.
There's no need to risk humiliating her. Leave the box for her to pack on her next visit, and encourage her to see if there's anything she wants.
It's fine for mothers and daughters to talk about these things, even if you traditionally haven't.
If you feel comfortable sharing what you discovered, do so in hopes of starting a dialogue about sexual health and pleasure.
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