"I always envisioned myself being a tough-but-loving "old school" parent. But now that I'm older - and wiser - I can look back and see how my parenting has evolved over the years. As I learned more about child development and psychology, I evolved from a more traditional approach to parenting to a gentler one. Now I wish I had been more gentle when my two oldest kids were younger."
"Today, I'm doing what feels best to me. For example, I don't actually need to punish my child for wasting their entire allowance on an item. The natural consequence is that they don't have spending money for the rest of that month until it's allowance time again. Allowing my kids to learn from their decisions and experiences is something I now value, and it has become a significant part of how I parent my four children: two teenagers, an almost-teen, and a 9-year-old."
Parenting shifted from an old-school, disciplinarian approach to a gentler, guidance-focused method after exposure to child development and psychology. Gentle parenting emphasizes support during challenges, natural consequences, and trust-building rather than fear-based punishment. Practical examples include allowing a child who spends their allowance to experience reduced spending for the month rather than imposing separate punishment. The approach values learning from decisions and experiences to build coping skills and decision-making. Gentle parenting maintains consequences while avoiding permissiveness. The method is applied across four children of varying ages and aligns with connective and trauma-informed practices used in adoption communities.
Read at Business Insider
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