Michelle Obama says she never understood something her mom always said - until she had kids of her own

"I think she wanted me to know throughout my life, she wanted to hand us our lives early. Like you're responsible. You did this for yourself,"

"My mom would always say, and she would say this publicly, 'I didn't have anything to do with raising Michelle and Craig. They, you know, they always knew this.'"

"And I didn't understand that until I had kids. And I realized that the scariest thing is not just losing them or something happening to them. It's something happening to me, and my kids are going to go through life not feeling like they have what they need to get through."

Michelle Obama's mother talked openly about death during Michelle's childhood as a deliberate way to prepare her and her brother to be independent. The mother aimed to "hand us our lives early," instilling responsibility and a sense that the children had built lives for themselves. The mother publicly claimed she "didn't have anything to do with raising Michelle and Craig" to express confidence in their preparedness. Michelle later recognized, after having her own children, that the mother's intent was to ensure children would know parental values and be able to cope if a parent were lost.

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