"Even if a child seems relatively happy, that can lead any parent to be concerned that there is a problem - or else why would they be evasive? On the other hand, our teen patients tell us about how they try to avoid long car rides with their parents because it is inevitably seen by the parent as an opportunity to ask a lot of questions."
"Sometimes there is cause for concern. But many children don't reveal what is going on within them for other reasons. It is a way to establish separation and independence from you. Or they think you will not like what they have to say and might get angry and enforce some consequences. Or perhaps they cherish their privacy because they have a sibling who is always into their stuff."
"How can you create a relationship with your child that nurtures open communication? After all, if you ask a lot of questions all the time, you are not likely to engender ease between you about what is and isn't being said. One key way to raise a child who is naturally more inclined to be open with you about what is on their mind is to begin that process early on"
Parents commonly feel frustrated and worried when children do not share thoughts or feelings, but silence can reflect privacy, independence, or fear of negative reactions. Teens may avoid settings that feel like forced conversations, such as long car rides, and may use earbuds to pre-empt dialogue. Some children hide feelings to establish separation, protect privacy from siblings, or avoid parental consequences. Constant questioning can reduce ease of communication. Regular family talk time and clearly stating availability to help can foster a habit of openness. Beginning communication practices early supports later willingness to share.
Read at Psychology Today
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