For a healthy break, don't check your ex's social media

"Studies in the field of cyberpsychology and human behavior tend to link "ex-partner surveillance" on social media with poorer emotional recovery after breakups, including higher levels of distress, stronger longing, and less personal growth. "These findings are indicators that individuals haven't let go," said Michelle Drouin, a professor of psychology at Purdue University Fort Wayne, Indiana, US. "That impedes recovery and increases the emotional trauma, or the connection to the past partner.""

"While emotional pain drives us to check on an ex-partner on social media, doing that keeps the emotional pain alive. But it is hard to avoid because humans are wired to seek information, and breakups create an information vacuum. "The internet is tough for information seekers," said Drouin. "We're able to look-up anything we want 'How's the past partner doing? Have they moved on?'" We want this information, Drouin said, but getting it makes it harder for us to move on."

Repeatedly checking an ex-partner's social media often maintains emotional pain and impedes recovery after a breakup. Studies link ex-partner surveillance with poorer emotional recovery, including higher distress, stronger longing, and reduced personal growth. Seeking information after a breakup fills an information vacuum but paradoxically reinforces attachment. Online searches and social-media monitoring strengthen neural connections tied to the past relationship that should be weakening. The ease of obtaining updates on the internet perpetuates a feedback loop of checking and emotional reactivation. Breaking the cycle of online surveillance supports healing and allows brain pathways and emotional focus to shift away from the former partner.

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