"The version that listens well, agrees easily, shows up when needed, and never makes a fuss can fill a room with people who like you and still leave you feeling completely alone at the end of the night."
"Comfort, it turns out, is not the same as closeness. I lost my closest friend from college to a slow, quiet drift. There was no argument, no dramatic falling out."
"Psychology has a term for what happens when someone consistently smooths over their real thoughts and feelings to maintain harmony. It's called self-silencing."
"The people most prone to self-silencing are often the ones everyone describes as lovely, warm, easy to be around. They've learned that being agreeable is how you stay safe."
People who lack close friends are often not difficult but rather overly agreeable, making themselves easy to be around. This behavior can prevent deeper connections, as true closeness requires some friction. The comfort of being agreeable can fill social spaces but leave individuals feeling alone. Self-silencing, a tendency to suppress real thoughts and feelings for harmony, is common among those described as lovely and warm. This learned behavior often stems from a desire for safety and acceptance, ultimately hindering genuine relationships.
Read at Silicon Canals
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