"Let him get his yeehaw on in peace. I understand your confusion and agree that it's a little eccentric, but we're all allowed our harmless eccentricities. It sounds like he's exploring a new form of self-expression. Maybe he got really into the television show Yellowstone. Maybe he just likes the feel of cowboy boots. It's all fine. Try to lead with curiosity if you talk with him about it."
"Curiosity can be hard, I know, when the truth is we just don't agree with another person's choice. But see if you can leave your opinion aside and ask him what's motivating this change in style. If he feels your genuine interest, he may share something that surprises you. Maybe there's no big idea behind the change, but it's always enlightening to hear about the things that excite others. At the very least, it'll give you more insight into your spouse's inner life."
A long-term spouse adopted a cowboy aesthetic—boots, collar tips, and a hat—causing discomfort and feeling costume-like in daily life. The change appears to be a harmless personal eccentricity and a form of self-expression that may stem from cultural influence, comfort, or simple preference. Responding with curiosity and leaving judgments aside invites a conversation about motivation and meaning. Genuine interest can reveal surprising reasons or show there is no deeper intent. Engaging respectfully offers insight into the partner's inner life while preserving autonomy and mutual respect within the relationship.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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