"I know that sounds fast, but I'm not 22 anymore. I've lived on my own for years, built a career, been in serious long-term relationships and have done a lot of personal growth. I know who I am, what I want and what I will and won't tolerate in a partner. When I met my fiance, it didn't feel impulsive; it felt intentional."
"We've had the hard conversations about finances, kids, faith, where we want to live, how we handle conflict, etc. We've met each other's families and friends. Nothing about this feels rushed to me. Yet my family and several close friends keep telling me it's too soon."
"Last week, my mom told me that she was married and divorced before she met my dad. I am 35 years old, and she just shared this with me now. I was surprised because she has never mentioned this before. I had no idea there had been another marriage, and it feels weird that something so big was hidden from me for my whole life."
Two individuals seek advice on relationship timing and family communication. The first, a 35-year-old professional, became engaged after five months of dating. Despite having serious conversations about finances, children, faith, and conflict resolution, family and friends question the pace. The writer feels confident and intentional rather than impulsive, yet doubts creep in from external judgment. The second person discovers their 35-year-old mother was previously married and divorced before meeting their father, information withheld for their entire life. The casual revelation raises questions about why such significant life events were hidden and what else might remain undisclosed. Both situations involve navigating family relationships and personal certainty amid external skepticism.
#relationship-timing-and-engagement #family-judgment-and-external-pressure #family-secrets-and-disclosure #personal-autonomy-and-decision-making #communication-in-relationships
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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