This is how we do it: I'll have to tell my wife what's going on soon'

"When I met Rita through a ramblers' club 18 months ago, I was instantly fascinated by her, and the more that we flirted at group meet-ups, the more intrigued I became. Still, I waited months to initiate anything making up some pretext to pop over, then asking permission to kiss her. She agreed, but she said she needed more time to think before taking things any further, which of course I understood though I was dying to sleep with her."

"When she did invite me over explicitly for that purpose, the decision felt measured, but the sex itself was wonderfully playful and spontaneous. We're both obsessed with oral, and we've messed around with bondage, too. In general, though, I'd say our tastes are pretty vanilla; what makes the sex incredible is our chemistry, and the complete lack of judgment and pressure. There's no expectation for me to stay hard for hours on end, which I've felt before."

"I'm fully aware that what we are doing falls outside the bounds of conventional morality, but the truth is I've fallen in love with her I've been with my wife for decades, and our marriage is now sexless, which used to sadden me. I have my doubts that we're going to stay together in the future, but we're both devoted to our daughter, who's in the middle of her GCSEs."

He met Rita through a ramblers' club 18 months ago and waited months before initiating physical contact, creating pretexts to visit and asking permission to kiss her. She initially wanted time, then invited him over explicitly for sex; the encounters felt measured yet playful and spontaneous. They both favor oral sex and have experimented with bondage while otherwise describing their tastes as fairly vanilla. He emphasizes intense chemistry, lack of judgment, and freedom from performance pressure. He has been married for decades, describes the marriage as sexless, is besotted with Rita, doubts the marriage's future, and wants to protect his daughter during her GCSEs while planning to disclose the affair and potentially pursue an open arrangement.

Read at www.theguardian.com