Participants must acknowledge that embarking on a Midlife Girls' Trip involves multiple social and physical risks and that attendance is voluntary. The waiver lists potential social issues such as quick formation of cliques, excessive vacation-talk from one attendee, intensive nostalgia, and developing quirks like an aversion to shared rentals. Physical risks include sunburn, food-related stomach ailments, rashes from questionable lotions, karaoke-related scrapes, sleep disruption from noise machines, hangovers from unfamiliar alcohol, and bruises from rushing to shared amenities. Payment for activities must be agreed upon in advance to avoid resentment and passive-aggressive behaviors. Gift-giving is optional but may affect sleeping arrangements.
You ("Participant") acknowledge that, despite all social-media posts to the contrary, embarking on a Midlife Girls' Trip holds many risks, just some of which are outlined below. By signing this waiver, you accept that going on this outing is voluntary, even if your group chat made it not feel that way. You also agree that, though you don't like the term "Girls' Trip" (or Megan's suggestion of "Lady Vacation"), you're going to have to decide if that's the metaphorical hill you want to die on.*
Additional physical risks of this Girls' Trip may include: unusual sunburn, stomach ailments from food ordered "for the table," rashes from using Michelle's sketchy CBD lotion, scrapes from karaoke power struggles, disturbed sleep due to whale sounds from Nicole's noise machine, hangovers from types of alcohol not consumed since 1998, and bruises from banging into furniture while racing to the coffeemaker before Meredith, who insists on making that cinnamon-bun-flavored kind.
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