"I was born in 1984, developed early, and was taught that the additional space I took up with my body was shameful. I remember the teacher calling me up to retrieve my test results as the classroom began a steady chant of Mooooooo. At 41, I can't remember a time when my weight was not connected to my worth. Whether it was family, friends, or perfect strangers, my body has always dictated how I was seen, if at all."
"Despite the celebrities who have promoted body positivity, only to lose weight and be celebrated later, it rarely trickles down. And I wonder if it is more for optics than reality. I've recently gained about 15lb and started running again. Most days, I don't feel as though I have a right to be on the path. I tie a jacket around my waist to hide my butt. On the bad days, I even go so far as to take a more isolated route."
Claims that the 1990s were uniquely toxic are questioned, with no clear end to body-shaming. The writer describes lifelong weight-based shame beginning in childhood, including bullying and being taught that occupying extra physical space was shameful. Weight has consistently been tied to self-worth by family, friends, and strangers. Celebrity-promoted body positivity often reverses when celebrities lose weight and are celebrated, and such shifts rarely benefit ordinary women. Recent weight gain and renewed running have produced feelings of illegitimacy on public paths, concealment behaviors, and avoidance. Extra weight is interpreted as a personal flaw requiring fixing, and this experience persists for many women.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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