Absolutist thinking can fuel self-sabotaging thought processes. Early experiences of feeling unfairness were challenged through language that avoided always, never, and forever. Possibility-based thinking emphasized acceptance and harmony with life’s natural flow, linked to wu wei 無為 and non-action. Getting out of one’s own way reduces self-sabotage and negative mental states. Self-doubt can shift into procrastination or paralysis. Even without clinically diagnosed mental illness, people may not live the life they want. Years of therapy can still coincide with hiding from emotions and avoiding what is truly felt. Negative self-talk can create recurring catastrophes that demand immediate attention.
"My American-ness rubbed up against my Hui-ness. I remember remarking to my dad that life was always going to be unfair for me, and loads of other people never had it as hard as I did. My dad was quick to point out my faulty thinking and my use of words like always, never, and forever. "Why do you use these words?" he asked. "Some days are hard, and some days are not, for all people.""
"Then he sat at the kitchen table, sipping his tea as if he were a monk sitting cross-legged on a mountaintop. I didn't hear him utter my forever kind of language. Instead, he peppered his conversations with possibilities and set aside anything that seemed remotely permanent. To him, life was about acceptance and harmony with the natural flow of life. It is wu wei 無為 or non-action, sometimes you do nothing, and everything flows."
"Over time, I have found that it is best to get out of my own way. Being my own worst enemy can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors and negative states of mind. Self-doubt, for example, can morph into procrastination, or worse, paralysis. Even though we do not suffer from a clinically diagnosed mental illness like crippling depression or a debilitating emotional disorder, we still do not have the life we want to live."
"Or we may have religiously attended therapy for years, yet find ourselves hiding from ourselves. We might ask ourselves, Wh""
#self-sabotage #cognitive-distortions #therapy-and-emotional-avoidance #mindset-and-acceptance #wu-wei-
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