"Looking ahead for myself, all I could see were broken shards, glomming and splintering, far from the awed and vibrant colors and geometric shapes that reform with the twist of the kaleidoscope in transition. I was early in my career as a counselor. More by dumb luck than prescient insight, somewhere deep within me I knew that I was vulnerable and at risk to make really bad choices. I was hurting and needed to feel better."
"I've taken to framing our responses as compulsions: a word that holds a negative connotation but actually is value neutral. Certainly, within the arena of psychology, this word is a defining characteristic for numerous debilitating conditions. That noted, I'm offering a broader consideration for the character of compulsion. I define compulsion as any act or behavior done repeatedly for the purpose of reducing anxiety or other emotional pain. The actual value of the compulsion resides in what act is chosen."
A counselor faced a painful divorce and feared for a young daughter's future, choosing to learn guitar as a coping strategy. Many people seek relief from psychic pain and repeatedly perform acts to reduce anxiety or emotional pain; these acts are framed as compulsions. Negative compulsions such as alcohol, drugs, gambling, pornography, or violence soothe quickly but deepen distress over time. Positive compulsions such as exercise, volunteer work, mindfulness, or cultivating bonsai trees grow slowly yet support durable healing. The value of a compulsion depends on the action chosen and its long-term effects on well-being.
Read at Psychology Today
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