Bagels, Ranked
Briefly

The article humorously ranks various types of bagels based on their flavors and contributions to the overall experience when paired with traditional toppings. From pumpernickel, praised for its perfect balance with cream cheese and lox, to more outrageous options like chocolate chip and cinnamon raisin, the article critiques the choices that bagel enthusiasts make. It also delves into what these preferences might say about the individual's personality and upbringing, weaving in cultural references and personal anecdotes that evoke nostalgia and wonder about food choices.
The king of bagels, pumpernickel is strong in flavor but harmonizes perfectly with cream cheese and lox, making for a delightful experience.
Opting for a plain bagel shows a preference for a subtler taste that complements lox without overshadowing it, offering a unique flavor dynamic.
Choosing everything bagels might suggest a decision-making process that leans towards wanting a little bit of everything, indicative of indecisiveness.
Selecting chocolate chip bagels raises questions about understanding what a bagel is, indicating a potentially immature palate that favors sweetness over tradition.
Read at The New Yorker
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