"If it goes with them back to school, it will be a distraction from their studies. What should I do here? Give it to them outright, as they are an adult and can make choices, give it to the two of us together and insist it stays at home, or find a different, less distracting gift? I'm inclined to the second choice but it seems a bit controlling. My husband is leaving the choice up to me. What should I do?"
"Give your kid the gaming system without caveat and with joy. Tell them they deserve it and you're happy to give them something they wanted. Later, you can offer to let them keep the console at home if they'd like. But tell them with conviction that you're proud of them and know they can handle it. Your kid is an adult-a fledgling, sure, but imposing rules on them isn't the way to go here."
A college student manages a disabling medical condition that has affected academic performance, including failing and dropping classes and reducing course load. The parent purchased a gaming system as a birthday present but worries it will distract from studies if taken back to school. The parent considers giving it outright, keeping it at home, or choosing a different gift and feels conflicted about imposing rules. Give the gaming system without caveat, express pride and support, and offer the option to keep the console at home if the student prefers. Avoid imposing controlling rules and recognize the student's success and resilience despite ongoing medical challenges.
Read at Slate Magazine
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