In a heartfelt letter to the Care and Feeding advice column, a stepparent expresses her deep struggle with not feeling maternal love for her 14-year-old stepson. Despite having provided care, attention, and support, she is unable to form the emotional bond she has with her biological children. She fears that her lack of love is affecting her stepson, recognizing that he might feel the absence of affection on a subconscious level. Her internal conflict of dealing with guilt and resentment continues, leading her to seek advice and reassurance from others.
I do the things, buy the stuff, spend the time, ask the questions, try to engage. And I feel none of it.
His father and I have our own biological children now, and what my heart feels for my own is everything that I don't feel for my stepson.
I know that even if he can't consciously recognize my lack of maternal love, he feels it subconsciously and there's no way that this isn't fucking him up.
Everyone has reassured me over the years that my love for him would come, not to push it or rush it.
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