"What you should have said when asked was, I would be so happy to do the whole dessert. I know a perfect ice cream that would go with the pies. But since it is 30 people, would you mind terribly if I don't do the wine? The key points to this answer were: You expressed excitement; you expanded what you originally offered thus meeting your hostess halfway;"
"You also declined to give reasons for your counteroffer (you don't know anything about wine; it won't fit in your car; you are allergic to cabernet), which would only have encouraged your hostess to haggle. Finally, you gave your contribution a name (dessert), which, to Miss Manners at least, lends the power of thematic unity to what was otherwise a mere shopping list."
Express enthusiasm and offer a bounded, named contribution (for example, "the whole dessert") when invited to a large gathering. Suggest a complementary item but decline to take on an excessive, costly request such as supplying large quantities of wine for many guests. Expand the original offer to meet the host halfway while making the limit clear and leaving the final choice to the host. Avoid offering explanations for the refusal, since reasons invite negotiation. Naming the contribution provides thematic unity and keeps the offer from becoming an open shopping list.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
Unable to calculate read time
Collection
[
|
...
]