#mental-load

#mental-load

This work has many names to me: mental load, emotional labor, logistical labor and, especially, narrative labor (the effort of constantly explaining myself, justifying choices, making life make sense for everyone else). It's the work that says, "I'll just do it; it's quicker." Or, "It's fine, I'll figure it out" Or, "No one else will remember, so I'll make a list."

11:29 A.M. That's the exact time my phone rang on the first day of school. It was the school nurse. My child had been "back to school" after a long summer break for precisely two hours and 29 minutes before he needed me again. He had an ear infection, and his ear was draining fluid. "I'll be right there," I heard my cheery mom voice telling the nurse. Inside, of course, I died a little.

I'm absorbing a lot of criticism and I'm not really allowed to give my own. I'm a sounding board for everyone's emotions but I need to be reserved in my own until I know how you're going to feel about them. I'm pushing forward and supporting you whenever and however I can. I barely even have my own thoughts unless you say it's okay.

'Oh, what's on it, you ask? Well, 'Bear or Bunny Day,' bringing in a stuffed bear or a bunny to cuddle with today - Oh, it has to start with 'B.''