Miss Manners: I claimed to have a conflict, and then I got caught

"DEAR MISS MANNERS: I frequently attend team lunches and dinners with my immediate department members, both supervisors and associates. These dining experiences are mostly personal affairs and come after a week of hard teamwork. We work in an industry where we will be in one location for a few months, and then move on to another city. We all get along and have each other's back."

"But here is the problem: There are two members of our team who are in their 20s, and they both have the worst table manners! They set their bread on the bare table, as well as any soiled cutlery. They cut up their entire meal into tiny pieces like they are toddlers. I could go on, but you get the idea. These are nice young women! They are college-educated."

"GENTLE READER: Although there is, today, too much blurring of the professional and personal spheres, it was always understood that an otherwise promising mentee who did not know how to speak or behave in polite company would be at a disadvantage in a professional career and that a good mentor might have to help make up this deficiency. Perhaps you can identify a senior member of the team who might act in this more general capacity for these two as a professional mentor"

A person declined a friend's lunch invitations by citing scheduling conflicts and later admitted to not feeling sociable. Workplace teams often share informal lunches and dinners after periods of intense collaboration while moving between cities. Two young team members exhibit very poor table manners, such as placing bread and soiled cutlery on the bare table and cutting their meals into tiny pieces. Their behavior causes embarrassment for coworkers and appears to harm their dating prospects despite their education. Social skills and table manners can affect professional advancement. Assigning a senior colleague to mentor them can provide opportunities to improve etiquette.

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