"I felt excited to share ideas from my new book and put them into practice with people who could make a real impact. Wouldn't it be great if more of our leaders engaged in wiser efforts? Then I learned who was leading the workshop the day before me: a Harvard professor, West Point graduate, and all-around powerhouse. Reading his bio lit up a drive in me: I have to beat him. I have to be better than him."
"What followed wasn't pretty. I rewrote my bio to showcase every achievement. I stuffed my slides with citations and research. And in the process, I lost sight of why I was there in the first place. I had fallen into the very trap I was there to unhook people from: chasing status, control, and approval. Maybe for you it's chasing social media likes, a better body, or that colleague who always seems to get more recognition."
A leader invited to teach a workshop initially felt eager to share ideas and create impact. Encountering an accomplished co-presenter triggered a competitive drive to outshine that person. The leader then rewrote a bio, overloaded slides with citations, and shifted focus from purpose to image. That shift exemplified falling into a cycle of chasing status, control, and approval. Common modern targets include social media likes, appearance, and workplace recognition. Small rewards provide brief relief but quickly fade, producing a loop that requires ever more hits while diminishing lasting satisfaction.
Read at Psychology Today
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