Instead of a Resolution, a New Year's Investigation

"If you anticipate that happening, you might want to try a different approach: rather than trying to decree bad behavior away, investigate it. Ask yourself what you feel like just before doing what you'd rather not, or not doing what you should. Where in your body does the (undoubtedly uncomfortable) feeling settle? The hard part is to let yourself feel it, which will hopefully reveal the emotional state underlying it, like depression, anger, or anxiety."

"The success of New Year's resolutions, like promises to cut back on drinking or binge-eating quarts of Talenti, is famously fleeting. Of course, changing behavior can sometimes change brain chemistry and your social world, thus easing your life. More typically, though, at least in my experience, even if you've resolved your way to going to the gym twice a week, or stopped procrastinating, a new problem will soon emerge, or a variation on the old one."

New Year's resolutions commonly fail within weeks. Investigating the sensations and emotions that precede unwanted behaviors can expose underlying causes like depression, anger, or anxiety. Asking where feelings settle in the body and allowing oneself to feel uncomfortable sensations enables identification of emotional states. Behavior change can alter brain chemistry and social context, but without emotional investigation new problems or variations frequently arise. An examined case traced excessive preparing and compulsive organizing to anxiety, experienced as frantic energy, sleepless exhaustion, and hyperfocus. Tracing behaviors back to why the anxiety exists helps reveal triggers and offers a path to more durable change.

Read at Psychology Today