Our marriage counselor asked us to set a regular date night, one day a week where we'd do something special together to reconnect. My ex-husband could never pick a day. I offered to make any day work that was good for him, but he straight-up said, 'What if something better comes up on that day?' I didn't give up. I reassured him that we could reschedule as needed if things came up on our date night that he'd rather do. He still couldn't commit, got this deer-in-the-headlights look, and refused to schedule even one day to spend with me. It was almost funny how scared he looked - the only time I can remember him feeling fear instead of instigating it.
But it really drove home to me that he saw me as his absolute lowest priority, and the sad thing was, in that moment, I realized I'd made myself my lowest priority, too. The counselor and I had a good, long look at each other, and neither of us had to say a word. We both knew it was over. It took a little longer to convince my ex that I was serious, though.
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