#emotional-manipulation

#emotional-manipulation

Hoovering isn't about genuine love or reconnection. It's a manipulation tactic used by narcissists or emotionally abusive partners to regain control once they sense you're leaving or have moved on. This behavior can happen days, months, or even years after the breakup. It often starts when the narcissist feels lonely or threatened, or isn't getting any "narcissistic supply" or attention from their usual sources. The Psychology Behind Hoovering Narcissists seek control and power over you. When you go no-contact or start to rebuild a life separate from them, it challenges the narcissist's fragile self-esteem.

Admittedly, the advice to be grateful is often good-studies link gratitude to a broad range of positive effects on mental health, well-being, and more. For instance, market research reveals that businesses that prime their messaging with gratitude can move people away from entitled and materialistic attitudes (Lee & Namkoong, 2022). New research also shows that prayers of thanksgiving-rather than prayers of requests-are associated with higher psychological well-being (Fukuromoto & Abe, 2025).

Instead of making a straightforward request or voicing a direct want, someone who is dry begging hints at a need or makes a vague complaint, Cetnar added. So, instead of stating, "I wish we spent more time together," someone who is dry begging may say, "Oh, I guess I'll just stay home with the cat" - they're hinting at their displeasure instead of addressing it.

Have you ever frustratingly mumbled to your partner that it "must be nice to have a partner who walks the dog" in hopes of them walking the dog more often? Or have you ever sighed that you'll "just do the errands alone" even though you don't want to? Turns out, you may be dry begging, a tool that people use in relationships of all sorts to get their needs met.

When partners are unhappy, they communicate this mostly indirectly. They don't just express unhappiness during arguments - they're meaner, sabotage their partners, and deliberately stir negative emotions. They often have the attitude "If I'm unhappy, you're going to be unhappy too." Below are seven communication patterns people exhibit when they're unhappy in their relationship. This article isn't meant to be judgmental. Readers may notice they're enacting some patterns and on the receiving end of others.

Denominator neglect happens when someone focuses on the big picture (the total number of events) while ignoring the actual harm caused by a specific one. In math terms, it's like a fraction: the numerator (top number) is the painful event that affected you, and the denominator (bottom number) is the total number of times something happened. Denominator neglect is used to downplay serious issues by minimizing their impact, shifting blame onto you, or refusing accountability.

Brandon's behavior reflects his need for control and validation, deriving pleasure from manipulating others, which presents an ethical dilemma for his therapist.

Not the asshole. Your husband has spent five years deliberately making your life harder in tiny ways and then lying to your face to make you think you are crazy.